We are brought up reading about fairytale weddings, watching them on TV, where nothing goes wrong, the bride looks perfect and everyone has a super time. Reality shows have brought us back down to earth a little, but the behind-the-scenes goings-on at most weddings are not discussed in the open too often. What people don’t say is that even with the best planning, there will be variables you cannot account for and this may very well be the reason for a ruined wedding.

As the bridal couple, you need to understand that things will go wrong no matter how well you have planned your wedding. But because your guests don’t know what you had planned in the first place, they won’t even realize that there are things that are going wrong.

The chapel could be overlooked when the florist places the flowers. The date of your best friend might get drunk and make a fool of himself. Because the door of the room where the wedding cake is stored was left open, the dogs ate a large chunk of it. Your train will get a hole in it because you put the chair on it when you sat down for a moment before heading down the aisle. The caterer will have changed the menu at the last moment due to missing ingredients. The barman will have forgotten to stock up on your boss’s favourite tipple, or your pesky nephew will ruin every photo take by trying to jump in every single one. Unforeseen weather condition have stifled outdoor wedding plans, ministers have come in late, wedding cakes have been knocked over before the reception has even begun. There have been couples who were mistakenly booked for the smallest hotel room instead of the honeymoon suite because it was already occupied by another couple.

The bridal party, and in particular, the bride and her mother, could let this type of incident ruin an otherwise perfect occasion. Stressing over details that are no longer under your control is not constructive, just smile, relax, take a deep breath and move on to the next thing. One minor problem should not be allowed to ruin weeks or months of preparation, and affect the rest of your day or night.

These things happen even though you might not actually hear about them. Another thing they don’t tell you is that in each of these weddings, couples still managed to get married despite these mishaps. Most of the guests, in fact anyone not involved in the planning, will barely notice most of these problems, and no one will think any less of you for not planning for such circumstances. Most of them will enjoy their meal, have a good time, and go away thinking ‘What a lovely wedding’. Which is exactly what you should also try to do.

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